Call me rude, call me a brat, call tantrumatic (if that word even exists), yadiyaya.. I'm dying to get out of this country. And even if I'm gonna leave, I'm not gonna really on a single cent from you to get me outta here. Cause you won't understand and you'll never understand. Neither will you ever try to. Thorn in my flesh. Really.

I'm bothered. Extremely. I've lost faith in the fact that I'll ever have, what's that called again? PERSONAL SPACE. Yeah, believe it or not. I'm 19, & I still don't even have a space I can label "PERSONAL". It's not even like I'm sharing a room with my brother or something. I think I'd have less issues with that. Speaking of brother, I should ask him to help me with the inception. But seriously. My cousin has moved in & I still don't have my room? I still have to live in the same room as my P_____s. YES. P_____s. Hello, it's not like there's a lack of space in this house ok. What happened to he'll move upstairs once he goes into the army. Eh, like when was that? Only about 1 year & 4 months ago? Every year I say, yes it's gonna happen. And then what? What do I get? Oh, move this person in you know, oh move that person in. Who in the world knocks on the door before they enter their own room?! Oh wait does it even belong to me in the first place? Yahyah, so she says "if I say you'll get it you'll get it". I'm sorry m'am, you say that every year too. Why should I believe you this time? Quit your selfish ploy to keep me up there till I'm 30 & married. Do I know this too well? And why in the world am I getting scolded because my things are in stacks here and there somewhere around the house? Yeah, why? I don't even have a proper place to put it. Sorry, do you happen to have a spare room for me to put all these things? Don't think so.

& that's not the end of it. I can't even go out alone? Like walk out, or like walk home IN BROAD DAY LIGHT? Yeah sure, one near bad experience, but seriously? I've never been encouraged once, but for doing something well. At least not by her. Yah, I try to picture her as the person who wants me to do better so she's pointing out the bads & never the goods. But no. Never, it's not working. I've just lost the faith to ever be good enough for anything. I'm a caged bird, wings free, but afraid to fly. Apparently, bringing in invader no.2 has taken its toll. The only place I can study at is occupied. Don't call me selfish, cause you have no right too. I'm almost 20. Give me a break.

If I could just fly off to some foreign country now. Live there. Worry for me, it don't matter. At least I'll have some personal space & learn something called independence. I'm sorry, my temper has gone quite extreme recently. It's getting out of control. I just want some peace & space, my life would be better. I don't wanna be angry. I hate it. I don't want my heart to harden. I don't wanna be lovelessly hateful. But its so hard & painful living under control all the time. I'm the bird that wants to break free & fly. I'm sick of walking when I have wings to fly. I just really can't wait for 3 weeks to go. 3 weeks. And even if it's just gonna be 8 days, I hope it'll be the longest 8 days of my life. Birdie gets to fly. And while I'm at it, I'm gonna do my best to pursue the things that will give me my freedom. I don't understand why I've to feel guilty for demanding it. But it's been too long. I'm tired.

It's Easter, Happy Easter world!! (Ok, what a spoiler. Cause Feifei's staying over. Hai. He keeps jumping around, it's giving me a headache.) Nonetheless, Happy Easter! May you get baskets full of Cadbury choco eggs & hot cross buns. My hands are aching to bake something tomorrow. Like cookies or cupcakes or, erm.. actually I would really do raisin & cinnamon snicker doodles. Yeah, so it will be.

The new semester's starting Monday. Gosh. 3.1. Feels like we were just freshies 2 days ago. Royston even called me just to wish me 2 years of friendship last week. Oh wow right? But I'm kinda determined to do well this semester. I'm saying it this time, just like I've said for all the other semesters. Really, in Debs' words, "GWAGWA." Wts, but yah, gwagwa. I do wanna do well though. Wish me the best of luck.

Oh, & on a greater note. Korea's on the cards. Yeah, like finally. Omg. And the greatest part of it all, I'm going with my pabos. Just that, Van's going instead of Pris. So not exactly pabos. But fair enough. WE ARE KOREA GO (Direct translation). We're going, after like a full week of anxiety & uncertainty that we were gonna make it happen. Plane tix settled, hotel settled, itinerary planned, subway maps printed. Might sound like an exaggeration the fact we've still got another 7 weeks to go? Thereish. But with school starting & all. Whatever. Gonna lose me some weight. Some Koreans say Koreans are not so skinny, but seriously? They all look so skinny to me. Especially those in Singapore you know. Gonna lose me some weight otherwise I won't be able to fit into any of their clothes. (Insert BBM's can't-watch-face)

Okz, I'm gonna catch some sleep now. Alice yeepo just threatened panda eyes if I don't sleep like NOW. Till whenever.

Olla! As much as I don't think anyone ever watches this space anymore, I'm back yo. (Oh gosh, my mum's like talking damn loudly on the phone. I don't know if it's her voice. Like it's deafening. Every time she talks, I feel my head start to throb. Plugging in isn't even helping.) Life's been a whirl. The nightmare of my life, Sem 2.2, it's over, I can hit the roads in a couple of months, new dream, new vision & pabos, the loves of my life. Anywayz, here's something really awesome that I randomly found while googling, but it's mighty awesome.

http://www.fleuravenue.com/

Results will be out in 3 days. Oh joy, I don't know what to expect. But I think so is the rest of the world. Except for Piaopiao & Kent. Right now, I just can't wait to get home. I WAN GO HOME NAO. Ahhhh, that aside. Gotta be up at 4AM tomorrow, I should seriously catch some sleep soon. Ben & Adriel are planning to go down to Shokuji at like 5AM for sashimi. What in the world, it better be good eh. Better be worth the eye bags. Then we're going Akihabara. Cross my fingers & pray we'll make it to Harajuku tomorrow too. Oh, but we're going Disney Sea on Thursday ^^ I WANTTT. It's supposed to be damn good right? HEHEHEHHEHEHEHEHEHE. Ahhhh, needa call home in a bit. If only I could skype Leka. My life will be complete. Hahaha, k, BYE BYE BYE.